Are you afraid of public speaking?

Earlier last week I was speaking to a group of corporate folks. It was a 2 days event and presentations were conducted by some of their own employee on the topic of leadership and teamwork.

I walked in on the first day when one of their presenters was presenting a topic on the importance of goal-setting. The presenter is this 6 feet tall guy wearing a blue polo shirt with a pair of light color slacks. Professional, well-spoken, but sounded a bit nervous when speaking. His body language suggested some tension while speaking in front of the group.

When it was my turn to speak, I remember starting off by asking everyone who is afraid of speaking in public? Almost everyone raised their hands.

What is it about speaking in public that frightens you?

Recently I have been given my public speaking career some thoughts. When I was about 9 years old, my elementary school in Taiwan started this whole campaign of public speaking on the topic of the anti-spy campaign. It originated from the tension between the Republic of China (Taiwan) and Mainland China back in the early 1980s.

I suppose I had traits and characteristics for public speaking. I liked being a performer who is performing even at a very young age. My parents taught me to express myself in such a way that shows the artistic side of me. Even at home, my dad would make me drums, pom pom, or buy me karaoke machines to perform on special family occasions.

I was never afraid to perform.

My fear of public speaking started after the car accident that changed my life trajectory. I became self-conscious about my body image. The more I saw my own differences, the more fear I have in being seen publically.

Here I am, standing in the back of the room watching this men’s body language expressing in fear. His voice sounded slightly shaky and he was hiding in the very corner of the stage instead of owning his stage.

Now, imagine that’s you on the stage. Where would you like to stand?

Perhaps just like him, you would simply occupy a small corner of the room and hoping to go through your slides and be done with the presentation so you can get out of this. There’s the power behind the fear that we carry with us when we take over the room.

There is a saying that goes like this:

“The best way to do something is just to do it.”

A few days ago I was on a call with my client and I was talking to him about FEAR. The scary thing that keeps us small and holds us back from reaching our goals. The thing that hides underneath our bed at night and comes out to pull our legs when we are asleep. It’s that thing we keep avoiding it instead of facing it in the light.

The idea of facing your fear and walking with it can be quite strange to many people. “what do you mean you walk with it?” “what do you mean to bring it out in the light?”

If you think about it, fear is neither good or bad. It just is. Having fear sometimes serve us well. It protects us from danger and harm. It keeps us safe so no one else can hurt us at our most vulnerable times. Other times, having fear stops us from making choices that would lead us to a greater purpose in life. Fear is like a coin we toss and it has two sides.

So the idea is not to overcome or get rid of our fear. The idea is to face it and walk with it so it can do its thing at the most appropriate time. The idea is to make fear be an option we can choose at our will.

If you can start by learning how to navigate through your fear, I bet you will enjoy the time on stage more often than not. I bet you would look far more confident and comfortable next time you stand in front of an audience. And I bet you will start to love public speaking.